JSLALALAND

CITY & ITS PEOPLE

LA workout class subtext

In an LA workout class, when the instructor says 'easy,' believe your thighs instead. Sign-up, warm-up, core, yoga, spin and sound bath, all translated. Not roasting instructors; just so first-timers know it's normal to be lost.

Translated from Jasmine’s original Chinese. The illustrated slides are on the interactive reader.

Key points

Full text

  1. No.01 | When you sign up

    "All levels welcome" = your first class will make you question your life choices, but the instructor will fix your form; "Beginner-friendly" = the instructor is nice, the moves aren't; the 7 a.m. class means fighting for the waitlist a week ahead.

  2. No.02 | Before you walk into the studio

    "Doors close 5 minutes before class" = one minute late and you're not getting in; "Grip socks required" = bring your own non-slip socks, and you'll keep buying more pairs. Angelenos are late to everything, except workout class.

  3. No.03 | Warm-up

    "Let's start nice and easy" = the only easy 5 minutes today; "Just a little warm-up" = your legs are already shaking. The definition of warm-up varies by person.

  4. No.04 | Core

    You'll hear "Engage your core" 40 times in one class; "Belly button to your spine" = push harder. Grandma in a Taipei park says 'stand up straight'; same idea, minus the class pass.

  5. No.05 | When it starts to hurt

    "Feel the burn" = it's starting to hurt, "Take it up a notch" = it hurts more, "Just 10 more seconds" = at least 20, "Last one!" = three more. Same math as "10 minutes away."

  6. No.06 | Breathing

    "Find your breath" = you've been holding it; "Breathe into it" = remember to breathe when it hurts; when you hear "Inhale to prepare...", you know the next move is hard.

  7. No.07 | Yoga class

    "Listen to your body" is meant seriously; "Child's pose is always available" is an officially sanctioned break, nothing embarrassing about it. The gentlest thing about yoga class: you don't have to get all the way there.

  8. No.08 | Spin class

    "Add a quarter turn" = more resistance (every song adds some), "This is your climb" = the next 3 minutes are all uphill. The loudest, happiest 45 minutes in LA.

  9. No.09 | The last five minutes

    "Take your time getting up" is the most precious 5 minutes of the whole class; "Thank yourself for showing up today" has no subtext and is completely sincere. Showing up is the hardest step.

  10. No.10 | After class

    "See you next week?" = buy a class pack; "Let's grab a matcha after class!" = this is the real main event today; "I'm so sore" = I worked out, please compliment me.

  11. No.11 | What to wear to class

    "Oh, I just threw this on" = this outfit was carefully chosen; a top-and-bottom matching set is basic etiquette at LA workout classes. Activewear is the formalwear Angelenos wear most.

  12. No.12 | Sound bath and breathwork classes

    "Set an intention" = think of one thing you want to let go of today; falling asleep, crying, feeling nothing at all, it's all fine. In this kind of class, there's no doing it wrong.

  13. Why do Angelenos love classes so much?

    Everyone lives far apart, and most days you're alone in your car; a regular class is where you see the same group of people at the same time every week. In Taipei, exercise is a riverside run; in LA, it's a social life.

  14. The one hour a week you save for yourself

    You start going to class for your body; you keep going for that fixed slot: one hour, no phone, just looking after yourself.

  15. For you, at your first class

    Get there 10 minutes early to sign the waiver, bring grip socks (the front desk usually sells them), tell the instructor about any injuries first, switch to the easier version when you can't do it, and if you don't understand, watch the person next to you. The hardest part of the first class is walking in the door.

In this series

Read it with the slides →

An original JSLALALAND field guide by Jasmine Chang (@jslalaland).